Smiles unknowingly..

Weird, but true. Thoughts of you does make me smile..
You guys, i don't know how to thank you all for helping me. I really thought this would end up no where.
But i think there might be a way. I really, really LOVE you all for doing this. But just to be on the safe side, i'll stay over the fence. I don't want to raise my hopes for something that i'm not even sure of. But i hope it's the best. But i should consider " too. So i will let it be, and watch what happens. From my place, i can't do anything, i know. So i'll wish, wish hard.. I know i'll never regret this choice i've made. <3 Again, ily.

I gaze up at the sky each night
and find the brightest star.
It's always waiting there for me
so close, but yet so far...


P.s : I'm sorry..
               I didn't mean to.

Sometimes..

It feels like there is a way. But other times, i just feel like i'm hoping for somthing beyond imaginable. I will make sure what i set my mind into doing will happen, but this, i can't do a thing.. Smile even when your heart is hurting. That's what i'm doing. =)

I could really use a wish right now..

Why can't you just let it be?

Some people are just mean.
I've no strength to talk back to you. I'll let you decide. Do whatever you want. Cause sometimes, you will only get it when you face it. So, i give up.

I know what you mean, i don't expect you to answer me either.<3

Not so proud of it.

Dear you,
You really thought you could get away with this, didn't you? I mean, look where it has brought you now. I thought we were okay the other day when you said there was nothing more to it. So, yeah.. all the lies you threw at me was just invisible. Seriously, talk about me, talk about how i look..I don't care. But don't you dare pull my family into the crap you do to seek attention. I know i'm not rich, i know i don't live in a two-storey bunglow, (which you don't live in either). I've seen people with three times the money you have, and they're not like that. I'm sorry if the way i was gave you the wrong picture of my status. I really didn't know you could class your friends from the kind if place they come from. But for the place i live in, i know i can play the role of a royal princess from the way i've been brought up. I know i can walk the walk, and talk the talk. I have a happy family that loves me and i know i've not done anything that might hurt their feelings. So, i guess i shouldn't be ashamed of having people over. You should really learn how to respect one's feelings. Do you really think you're all that? I mean, do you really think by you faking about your luxury is going to get you anywhere? Be who you are, i mean, that is why you are made. Everyone is made for a reason and they way you've been treating everyone.. is not what you're made for. CHANGE. Stop backstabbing. It hurts. Stop calling people names.. STOP IT. Can't you think? Don't you have a heart? Why do you keep lying? Why do you even think of me that way? I didn't do anything to you. I wanted to be your friend even after being told about your attitude. I supported you. I expected you to change. But now i know it wasn't worth it at all. It hurts to know that i lost a friend. But at the same time, i think i don't need one that doesn't accept me for who i am. Where i live. How i'm like. So, i guess this is it? You'll have your own friends.. and please, treat them well. I know the pain. Loosing friends, easy. Finding true friends, is harder than you can think. Years.. When i stood there, i was with a family. A family of loving and caring friends. And i love them as much as i love my own family. They're worth that much. Gain friends like them, and backstabbing, bitching, insulting isn't going to get you any.. I hope you change. I'm sorry, i can't imagine having friends like you in my life. I think its the best, for you and i. There was a limit, you crossed it. Do whatever you want, but just don't mess with my friends. You stay where you are, and i'll stay where i am. Goodbye.

P.s: I Love you guys like no other.

Do i?

Being confused sucks.

Writing this, scares me..

 It's not something i know that it'll happen. But something i think that it might.
I hope this doesn't go too far. I'm afraid that i'll hurt you. I'm afraid that i'll get hurt. I'm so sorry, i really don't know what i'm saying. I feel like things are just full-speed ahead. I don't know how to react. I don't know what to react. So, if at all i do,sorry. Like the way you put it, lets just see where things go. This isn't going to change anything. I mean, not going to make it worst, or better. But the one place i would wanna scream things i really need to. Sorry.   And, you, I'm sorry. I did stand on your way. Let me know if i have to step off. I will.

P.s :  But that's alright, because i like the
                                                  way it hurts <3

I guess there's a reason behind it.

I know this crap is bringing you down. The surrounding just isn't the same without the old you. You're the freaking laugh bomb, i swear. You make me feel better when i'm down, but i just don't know how to, for you. I really wish i could say something to make you feel better, but everytime i do so, it comes out the wrong way. You know it to. It even pisses you off sometimes. I don't want that to happen. : / I miss the you i knew two weeks ago. I swear if i could, i would make the thing that's bothering you right now to dissapper in split seconds. But i don't have the power to. I only know of one, and i know of a person who can make this go, just go. I hope. I know you're stronger than this. And i know nothing bad is going to happen. Don't ask how, i just believe, you should do that too. I know the pain is horrible. But, i know you'll handle it eventually. You're awesome like how you'll always say it. You will always be. Your dream, yeah that million kilometer list of yours, it will come true. Everyone one of it. Very important you! Lovess! I've got the earrings you've wanted. I just need to wrap things up. I know you're going to love it. Sorry for the delay. It was LONG. : ) I'm really hoping you see this. : D feel better.

The only way i can do this.
-Prev-

You, yeah you.

Screw You!

I Failed!

Yes. I failed. I didn't clean my room. I'm NOT studying. I've stopped tution for this month. AND, i'm having a HEAD ACHE!  ...*died....
Well, today was a nice day though. I really had a good time. ICOM held a workshop over at my school. It was.. good. I mean, it helped alot. Tiring at the same time. For the record, we hardly moved. : D
Bla bla bla,had lunch. I didn't eat. : ( Ohh, ohh, i almost forgot. Our science project, it was AWESOME! : D
All our hardwork paid off. I'm really proud of you guys. : ') The smoking thing, was a perfect touch. Who cares what people say, we did our best, and we know it. And for that, i'm hoping we'll atleast get 2nd place. :S Is it too much to ask? Win or lose, we ROCK! Heeee, go 4 Sc 5! Back to band. We left 5minutes before school dismissal. It was a little rushy tho'. We had no time to change. Straight to MidV. Met the guys at the cinema. They were really friendly. : D Glad we made friends. ....*eyebrows to Cy...  hehe. Well, all i can say is that, we had fun. Hope to meet ya'll someother time. : )  Rained. = = yet i love you. Got home, had cooled ginger beer. Ehehe. I likey. Sat with shy. Crapped alot. The usuals. Bye bye shy, hello head ache.. Ishh.
Bye Bluess..

You wait. I've got things to solve. It wont take long.

Tomorrow is a new day.

Yes. Literally. I wanna be a new me. I hate the things i've been doing lately. I didn't really open my revision books. I feel, stupid. Yeah, that's the word. Oh, and according to my new tuition time table. This is how life will look like.

Her Life.

Monday : School. ( I've got time to nap!)
Tuesday : School, Literature class, Chem and Bio tuition, Maths tuition.
Wednesday : School, BM tuition.
Thursday : School, Band.
Friday : School, Band, Accounts tuition.
Saturday : Accounts tuition.
Sunday : Add maths tuition.

Kill Me?
And, i need to slott in extra revision. Where?!? Goshh is this toture or what? Well, i'll have to face it, i mean, i asked for it. So, now i shall go clean my freaking-messed-up-rubbish of a room and decide what to do when so i don't end up going crazy. Tomorrow is a new day.-Chicken little.
Wish me luck people. Ohh, ohh... FIFA! Woohoo! GO country that's going to win! xD Heh.

P.s : New begining. I'm hoping that nothing comes in my way. :D

One word explains it all.

I Quit.
I'll let it come to me.

It's like fire, burning..

Haihh, burning.. I don't even know why. I want it for you, and i don't. : / I'm such a bitch for doing that. I know, i'm sorry. But trust me, everything i do, is just the way you want it to be. So i'm hoping it happens the way it should. : ) Byee love.
Miss i'm such a saint, buzz off. I really can't stand listening to you and your crap. It's so Dead. Come on, you're not five to act like this. You really think you're so nice? Well, i thought you were untill i heard this. I don't want to lose you as my friend, but i really hope you lose the rotten attitude of yours. I really think you're a nice person under this person you're being now, change?  I know i'm not perfect, but atleast i know i'm not two-faced. Still, i don't hate you. sighhsss...Byee.
Sighs.. This weird feeling popped up today. I don't know the kind, but i know it isn't right.. Whyy? It's so hard living like this? Sometimes i really wonder what goes on in your mind. I mean, how can you stay so quiet? Goshh! The vibes you give me, it kills. I need an answer. <3 You're different. Byee "person"..
I'm broke! BROKE! This is the saddest part of life everyone has to face. It kills to know that i owe you, SORRY! I know you'll understand, but i feel horrible. I just wish i could work.. sigh.. Now that half is done, it doesn't seem that much. People are going to turn into Ah-longs.. I tell you, they're going to take red pen and scribble my face! : (  Byee Ah-longs. Love you!

You make me smile..  : )

First. Ramly Burger = Satisfaction.
Today was a boring yet tiring day. Report card day. Convo between mummy and I.
" Miee, tomorrow is report card day. You coming ah? "
" Ah? must come meh? No need la, i kan know you well enough dy. "
" Come laa.." " Don't wan laa."  -__- Awesome.
Okay, practically, school was boring. But with all the monkeys in my class, it was okay, i guess.. Singing, drawing, eating, screaming... Fun. Then, V and i went over to AmCorp for lunch. We spoke for like hours..It was nice. Sharing secrets.. Sighs.. it really has been long since we had that talk. :) Had a great screaming session over at V's place. We were soo loud, we couldn't hear V's grandma calling for her at the door. xS
Got a little screwing for that.. Shrugss. Rushed home for tuition. I had only 10 minutes to take my bath, eat, pack and leave the house. I managed to beat time. Reached tuition at 8.05p.m. As i was waiting to get an ear-full from teacher for not completing my homework, teacher reminded me that i acctually handed in my work for this during the other class two days ago. For a second, i acctually wondered whether he was talking about me, but yeah, then my brain finally decided to give in. Yay, Prev! : )  Never've been so proud of myself. Hehe. On the way back home, dad stopped infront of this burger stall. He took out a ten ringgit note and asked me to go get it. :O I was like, you serious? Yes, he was. Had a great dinner. Ramly!! You, don't ask me why? I've got a reason to why i feel the way i do, do you? I thought so. xD Oh, Baby Forest is wrestling with Patrick. I think Patrick needs surgery. FOREST!!!  Well, i guess that's all for today. Good night jelly beans.. Loves.

"You'll be my Hero.."

A journey to a place unknown.

"Rose", the theme from Titanic is so beautiful. I wanna learn it someday... sighs. The song  just makes me wanna stand under the rain and feel the raindrops on my skin. It's so sweet it can make you cry. I'm going to learn it on the violin very soon. : ) Reminds me of the past..and gives me goosebumps.

Bullshit. Sweet.

Like always, school was F.U.N. But yeah, there's always something to ruin my day. And again, its you. Unfair, unfair, unfair. I'll stop here. Before tuition, Esther, Elysia, Shy and i went to AmCorp. So we did everthing we wanted to, but one. : ( I think he got fired. Oh, well. So we had lunch at A&W, the we went to McD's for ice-cream. Hehe. Then, we walked into "xes appeal" and this cinderella shoes caught my eyes. ( i'll blog about that tomorrow ) Yes, had to buy it. And the best part is that you'll get a another pair of any shoes between the price of the one you bought, for RM1. Yeah, ONE. So, i got a pair of "glady" looking flats for me mummy. It looks simple yet attractive. It took me forever to decide which one i wanted. Loved it. I think i'll wear it for LitNight. OmeGee. Pirates of the Caribbean's soundtrack is killing me. It is like it's saying, "dude, quit killing -so and so- part.." : ( I really freak out because i'm afraid of playing the wrong note. But i'm fine when there's no pressure. So CHILLL!  xD I LOVE THE MUSIC. Argghh. It gives me the chills. I wanna play the song in an orchestra. Not the sax, but the violin. ........*faints.....Shoot me for wanting to learn all the insruments. :'( I will one day, cheaa..  xD I need a new profile picture!! Ish. Exam results are suckeyh. Report card day. DOOMED. Hehe. I just watched this video, a dog saying "i love you" on youtube. It's soo CUTE. Gosh i wish i could train my baby Forest to do that. : ) Fellow bloggers, it's time to go to bed. Atleast, it is for me, so good night pretty clouds.

P.s : You're the sweet melody.

                                                                      -kp-